Reconnecting With Your Partner Post-Rehab
The iconic American psychologist Elisabeth Kubler-Ross famously said, “The most beautiful people we have known are those who have known defeat, known suffering, known struggle, known loss, and have found their way out of those depths.” Now, the same is true in how you recover so you can become the best version of yourself for you (of course), but also for others. This is also emblematic of the importance of getting well and reconnecting with your partner post-rehab.
Understanding the Prevalence of Addiction in the U.S.
Many people don’t realize just how serious the addiction issue currently is in the U.S. Millions of individuals are currently struggling. According to the U.S. Department of Health and Human Services (HHS), through the Substance Abuse and Mental Health Services Administration (SAMHSA), “In 2022, 48.7 million people aged 12 or older (or 17.3%) had a substance use disorder (SUD) in the past year, including 29.5 million who had an alcohol use disorder (AUD), 27.2 million who had a drug use disorder (DUD), and 8.0 million people who had both an AUD and a DUD.”
It is important to remember that these numbers are more than just statistics. They represent millions of people whose lives are being devastated by the disease of addiction. Yes, addiction is an addiction. According to the Canadian Medical Association Journal (CMAJ), “Addiction is a chronic relapsing disease that we must treat as we do other such diseases. We do not expect the hearts of patients with heart failure to behave normally – we understand that their function has been altered by disease. Why, then, do we expect the brains of substance abusers to behave normally, since we know that their function has also been altered by disease?”
Addiction is also a disease that affects the entire family. This is especially true with close partnerships like marriages and various other types of unions and couplings. According to the peer-reviewed journal, Social Work in Public Health, “[T]he impact of substance use disorders (SUDs) on the family and individual family members merits attention. Each family and each family member is uniquely affected by the individual using substances including but not limited to having unmet developmental needs, impaired attachment, economic hardship, legal problems, emotional distress, and sometimes violence being perpetrated against him or her.”
Understanding the Prevalence of Addiction, Mental Illness, and Co-Occurring Disorders in the U.S.
These negative issues on partnerships can also be compounded when there are co-occurring disorders present (also known as comorbidities). Comorbidities are more common in the U.S. than many people may think. According to the National Institute on Drug Abuse (NIDA), “7.7 million adults have co-occurring mental and substance use disorders… Of the 20.3 million adults with substance use disorders, 37.9% also had mental illnesses. Among the 42.1 million adults with mental illness, 18.2% also had substance use disorders.”
When these co-occurring disorders are present, it can be not easy to help a loved one unless a proper diagnosis is made. Often the addiction or the mental illness mask each other because the signs and symptoms can be very similar.
This is why finding the right recovery center that can handle dual diagnosis is so vital. They will not only be able to make the correct diagnosis but they will also be able to treat both issues (or multiple issues) in tandem to ensure that healing at the cellular level begins to take place, and “healing at the cellular level” is what recovery is all about.
Healing at the Cellular Level
To heal at the cellular level means to heal the entirety of the capital S, “Self.” This means holistically healing physically, mentally, emotionally, and even spiritually.
The ultimate question then becomes, “How does one heal at the cellular level?” For this to happen, three aspects must be present. One is that the recovery must focus on the individual. Two is that the addiction and/or mental health care must be comprehensive. Three is that the recovery must focus on getting to the underlying root/core causes of one’s issues.
The Importance of Individualized Addiction and Mental Health Care
Individualized care is crucial for healing at the cellular level and attaining long-term recovery. Unfortunately, there are many recovery centers that only offer overarching recovery plans that don’t take individual needs into account. Here at Exclusive Hawaii Rehab, we find that that approach rarely works.
Effective individualized care must start with an extensive intake approach that focuses on individual needs and assesses background and personal information that might be playing a role in one’s current situation. This includes career stresses, social demographics, and, yes, familial (partner) issues and concerns. It also includes a focus on the individual goals that one seeks out of recovery. This is important because the individual should always have a say in their own recovery journey.
The Multi-Angled Approach: The Importance of Comprehensive Addiction and Mental Health Care
Effective recovery must also be comprehensive. Comprehensive recovery means that it must take into account all of the various means, methods, and modalities that are available for one to heal at the cellular level.
This includes utilizing modalities that come from all areas of recovery. There are psychotherapies like cognitive-behavioral therapy (CBT) and dialectical behavior therapy (DBT), experiential therapies like nature immersion therapy and art therapy, and holistic healing methods like yoga therapy and meditation. Utilizing all of these modalities will also help get to the crucial root/core causes of one’s addiction and mental health issues.
Getting to the Root/Core Causes of One’s Issues
There is a saying in recovery that goes, “It’s about the ‘thinking’ more than it is the ‘drinking.’” This simply means that recovery is about a lot more than just putting down the drink or the drug. It is about getting to the underlying root/core issues that cause that individual to pick up the drink or the drug in the first place.
These root/core causes are often associated with previous situations that an individual has gone through. This could include issues of trauma and post-traumatic stress syndrome (PTSD). Many people don’t realize just how common experiencing trauma is. According to the peer-reviewed journal Psychological Medicine, “General population studies have shown that a large proportion of people in developed countries have been exposed to at least one TE [traumatic event] in their lifetime (estimates from 28 to 90%), with the most common events being the unexpected death of a loved one, motor vehicle accidents and being mugged.” These issues should always be addressed before reconnecting with a partner post-rehab.
Getting Well Before Reconnecting With Your Partner Post-Rehab
Addressing these root/core causes is also essential before reconnecting with your partner post-rehab because one must get well apart before one can heal together. This is why it is recommended that partners recover separately from one another.
Also, it is not just about the individual who is struggling with the issue going away and getting help. It also allows space for the other person to heal as well. This may include individual therapy or attending support groups like Al-Anon (a 12-Step support group for family members of individuals struggling with addiction).
Reconnecting With Your Partner Post-Rehab: Getting Well With Psychotherapies
Psychotherapies like CBT and DBT can be particularly beneficial because they focus on getting to those root/core causes that were previously mentioned. These psychotherapies address the negative cognitions and emotions that one has about oneself and the world around them so they can begin to change the negative behaviors (including addictive ones) that are causing problems in their life.
One unique aspect of CBT is that it makes the individual an “active participant” in their own recovery. This gives them some essential authority in the process. According to the peer-reviewed journal Cognitive Therapy and Research, “Consistent with the medical model of psychiatry, the overall goal of treatment is symptom reduction, improvement in functioning, and remission of the disorder. In order to achieve this goal, the patient becomes an active participant in a collaborative problem-solving process to test and challenge the validity of maladaptive cognitions and to modify maladaptive behavioral patterns… Although these strategies greatly emphasize cognitive factors, physiological, emotional, and behavioral components are also recognized for the role that they play in the maintenance of the disorder.”
DBT can also be highly effective, especially for those struggling with co-occurring disorders. According to the peer-reviewed journal Psychiatry (Edgmont), “Dialectical behavior therapy (DBT) is a comprehensive, evidence-based treatment for borderline personality disorder (BPD). The patient populations for which DBT has the most empirical support include parasuicidal women with borderline personality disorder (BPD), but there have been promising findings for patients with BPD and substance use disorders (SUDs), persons who meet criteria for binge-eating disorder, and depressed elderly patients…DBT is a comprehensive program of treatment consisting of individual therapy, group therapy, and a therapist consultation team.”
Reconnecting With Your Partner Post-Rehab: Getting Well With Nutritional Therapy
Another critical aspect of recovery is nutrition and the way one treats oneself physically. Here at Exclusive Hawaii Rehab, we believe in the maxim, “Food is medicine.” This is why we put such a premium on nutrition and nutritional therapy.
Nutritional therapy is also as much about what stays out of the diet as what goes in. According to the Journal for Nurse Practitioners (JNP), “Nutritional Therapy uses food to prevent and reverse diseases that plague most western societies: diabetes, obesity, heart disease, arthritis, and depression. For food to be therapeutic, it must be nutrient-dense, measured in part by the nutrients and anti-nutrients, contained in consumed foods. Nutrients are plant and animal sources providing macronutrients (protein, carbohydrates, fat), micronutrients (vitamins, minerals, phytochemicals, antioxidants, probiotics), and fiber … . Anti-nutrients are food products that have no biological necessity.”
It is also important to note that good nutritional therapy also focuses on individual likes and dislikes when it comes to food as well as how a diet satiates one’s needs. This is why at Exclusive Hawaii Rehab, all of our meals are tailored for each client and are prepared by world-class chefs using local organic ingredients.
Reconnecting With Your Partner Post-Rehab: Getting Well With Experiential Therapies
Alongside psychotherapies and nutritional therapy, experiential therapies can also be highly effective at helping one recover at the cellular level. This includes nature-based experiential therapies like nature immersion therapy, surf therapy, and horticulture therapy.
Nature immersion therapy offers a myriad of benefits. According to the International Journal of Environmental Research and Public Health, “Besides improvements to physical and psychological well-being, exposure to natural environments has been shown to bring about positive impacts on cognitive functioning… While cognitive restoration and physiological well-being are the prominent and renowned benefits of nature exposure, there is one important construct that is often overlooked in environmental psychology research studies – that is, the human-nature relationship; also known as connectedness to nature (CN).” This “CN” can also be experienced while surfing a mere 15 minutes from our luxury property on Hawaii’s Big Island.
Surf therapy is a highly beneficial modality that is unique to environments like the Hamakua Coast of Hawaii’s Big Island. According to the International Journal of Environmental Research and Public Health, “Carefully planned water activities tailored to the needs of the individual can contribute to correct psychosocial and cognitive development. The International Surf Therapy Organization summarizes the benefits of adequately indicated surf therapy as follows: improved physical health and mobility; improved mental health, including reduction of specific symptoms, such as posttraumatic stress and depression; improved well-being (strengthening of trust and confidence, encouragement of independence, resilience and protective coping strategies) and improved social skills.”
Experiential horticulture therapy has benefits that are vast and varied. According to the International Journal of Environmental Research and Public Health, “People’s interactions with plants, through goal-orientated horticultural activities in the form of active gardening, as well as the passive appreciation of nature, could be therapeutic to people with mental disorders in many ways. First, horticulture could have emotional benefits, such as reducing stress, reducing psychiatric symptoms, stabilizing mood, and increasing the sense of tranquility, spirituality, and enjoyment. Second, it could help people to reduce fatigue and restore attention and cognitive ability.”
Reconnecting With Your Partner Post-Rehab: Getting Well With Holistic Healing Methods
Holistic healing methods are great modalities to use for recovery because once a practice is established they can be utilized virtually anywhere (including with your partner post-rehab). This is especially true with yoga and meditation.
Yoga offers an opportunity to heal physically, mentally, emotionally, and spiritually. According to the International Journal of Yoga (IJOY), “Therapeutic yoga is defined as the application of yoga postures and practice to the treatment of health conditions. Yoga therapy involves instruction in yogic practices and teachings to prevent reduce or alleviate structural, physiological, emotional, and spiritual pain, suffering, or limitations. Yogic practices enhance muscular strength and body flexibility, promote and improve respiratory and cardiovascular function, promote recovery from and treatment of addiction, reduce stress, anxiety, depression, and chronic pain, improve sleep patterns, and enhance overall well-being and quality of life.”
Meditation is highly beneficial and can be used both during yoga and independently. According to the International Quarterly Journal of Research in Ayurveda (AYU), “During the process of meditation, accumulated stresses are removed, energy is increased, and health is positively affected overall. Research has confirmed a myriad of health benefits associated with the practice of meditation. These include stress reduction, decreased anxiety, decreased depression, reduction in pain (both physical and psychological), improved memory, and increased efficiency. Physiological benefits include reduced blood pressure, heart rate, lactate, cortisol, and epinephrine; decreased metabolism, breathing pattern, oxygen utilization, and carbon dioxide elimination; and increased melatonin, dehydroepiandrosterone sulfate (DHEA-S), skin resistance, and relative blood flow to the brain.”
Reconnecting With Your Partner Post-Rehab: Recovering With Exclusive Hawaii Rehab
Here at Exclusive Hawaii Rehab, we believe in offering support after the rehab process has concluded. That is why all of our individualized recovery plans have a focus on the long term. We believe in long-term recovery over short-term “fixes.”
Elisabeth Kubler-Ross also famously said, “People are like stained-glass windows. They sparkle and shine when the sun is out, but when the darkness sets in, their true beauty is revealed only if there is a light from within.” We are here to help you find the light in the darkness. Recovery is inside of you. Let us help you bring it out into the light and into your life.
It is important to remember that seeking healing is the best thing one can do for their significant other. The good news is that here at Exclusive Hawaii Rehab, our programs facilitate essential healing at the cellular level, ultimately strengthening relationships. We also offer essential tips and strategies for reconnecting with a partner post-rehab and maintaining a healthy, supportive relationship. If you feel like you or a loved one is struggling with issues of addiction, mental health, or co-occurring issues, we can help get you on the positive path toward recovery right away. You don’t have to do this alone. For more information about healing at the cellular level, please reach out to Exclusive Hawaii Rehab today at (808) 775-0200.