Coming Home Again: Finding Family in Recovery

The iconic Irish playwright George Bernard Shaw famously said, “A happy family is but an earlier heaven.” This is true for many people. However, for those families affected by addiction and mental illness, “family” can be a bitter word. This is because the family is often devastated by these two diseases. The good news is that the state of devastation does not need to remain. Many effective means, methods, and modalities can help the family in recovery heal and grow at the cellular level.

The Importance of Individualized and Comprehensive Addiction Care

When it comes to recovery, it is important to choose the right recovery center right away. There is no point in making hasty decisions when it can spell life or death. But, how does one know if they are choosing the right recovery center? The key is to determine whether they are focused on the individual or the industry. Are they concerned about the client’s well-being or their own financial bottom line?

One way to determine this is to see if they offer individualized care or only overarching “one-note” recovery plans. Here at Exclusive Hawaii Rehab, we know that “one-size-fits-all” recovery plans rarely work. We also know that recovery plans must be comprehensive.

Another tell about the legitimacy of a recovery center is whether they utilize a multi-angled approach. But, what does “multi-angled” mean? It means that they use multiple modalities to ensure that the individual gets to their underlying root/core issues and heals at the cellular level.

Healing at the Cellular Level

Now, healing at the cellular level is all about healing holistically. Many people think that this strictly refers to Eastern philosophies or medicines, but that is simply untrue. Holistic means “whole.” So, holistic healing means whole mind-body healing – the physical, mental, emotional, and even spiritual.

Healing at the cellular level also means getting at the root/core causes of one’s addiction and/or mental illness. It is more about what causes the issue than the issue itself. The key is to dig deeper to see what is really going on below the surface. This certainly helps to garner a better understanding of addiction.

A Better Understanding of Addiction

Millions of people struggle with addiction every day. It is one of the most common diseases in the world, and, yes, it is a disease. It is now widely agreed upon by addiction specialists and medical professionals that addiction is much more than a condition; it is a disease.

Yet, many people continue to stigmatize addiction. According to the National Institute on Drug Abuse (NIDA), “Although substance use disorders are chronic and treatable medical conditions, studies show people with these disorders still face discrimination and stigma (a set of negative attitudes and stereotypes) that can impact their health and well-being in numerous ways. This stigma also affects people who use drugs who do not have a substance use disorder.” These stigmas are also faced by the families of those individuals struggling with addiction. After all, addiction is a “family disease.”

Finding Family in Recovery: Addiction as a Family Disease

Many people have heard the term “family disease” but are unsure of exactly what it means. Family disease simply means that addiction affects far more than just the individual who is struggling. This is why addiction is often referred to as a “tornado that destroys everyone and everything in its way.”

However, while the family may be the most affected by a loved one’s addiction, they also have an opportunity to do some serious good. Due to relationship status and proximity, the family is often the most likely to first get their loved one the help they need. Of course, to do so, they must first be able to spot the signs and symptoms of addiction.

The Signs and Symptoms of Addiction

Now, of course, the signs and symptoms of addiction are always going to vary based on the individual. However, one can look out for many universal signs and symptoms. The following are just a few of those signs and symptoms of addiction:

• Not being able to stop once starting to drink or use
• Feeling anxious, nervous, or overly “stressed out”
• Experiencing trouble at work or school
• Issues with relationships at home
• Losing interest in activities once enjoyed
• Isolating away from family and close friends
• Having trouble with sleep cycles, including sleeping too much and not sleeping enough (hypersomnia and insomnia)
• Feeling overwhelming dread
• Loss of appetite and a lack of care regarding physical appearance and well-being
• Exhibiting excessive mood swings
• Experiencing physical ailments such as headaches, body aches, and gastrointestinal problems
• Having feelings of worthlessness, hopelessness, and helplessness
• Causing harm to oneself or others
• Having suicidal ideations

Yes, people often minimize addiction, or even falsely categorize it as that previously mentioned “condition.” However, as one can see, these signs and symptoms are significant and can even be deadly. This is why reaching out for professional help as soon as possible is critical. Doing so could mean the difference between short-term side effects and long-term consequences. It is also important to understand the benefits of connecting with others in recovery.

Connecting With Others in Recovery

Working with others can be a critical component of one’s healthy recovery. It has been said that working with others is one of the best ways to avoid a potential relapse, and relapses are much more common than many people may think.

Also, it is important to understand that while relapses may be relatively common, they should not be normalized. According to the peer-reviewed thesis Addiction Relapse Prevention, by Doctors Guenzel and McChargue, “Individuals recovering from various forms of addiction frequently encounter relapses that have gained acceptance as an almost inevitable part of the recovery process. However, the normalization of relapses can reduce the urgency for providers, patients, and support individuals to prevent them from occurring. Countless individuals lose their employment, families, freedom, and even lives as a consequence of relapses.” 

An effective way to avoid these relapses is to engage in 12-Step recovery (or some type of community recovery system). They have been proven to work. 

Utilizing 12-Step Recovery

Many people push against 12-Step recovery because they feel as though it may be some type of religious-based program. This is simply untrue. Yes, it does reference God, but in the same breath, it emphasizes that “God” simply means a higher power of one’s understanding – it can be whatever one wants it to be. The key is to make sure that it is something greater than themselves that they can rely upon when times are tough.

Another major component of 12-Step recovery is the sponsor/sponsee relationship. This is when someone who has been through the process of recovery helps a “newcomer” on their recovery journey. It has also been shown to reduce the potential for a relapse. There is also a critical step that can help mend family relationships – the amends process.

Finding Family in Recovery: Making Amends in Recovery

The family is often very traumatized by a loved one’s addiction. This is because, in active addiction, an individual can do a lot of damage and push a family to the brink of exhaustion. The family also often struggles with codependency and not knowing how and when to set boundaries.

The amends process can help the family start to heal. The Ninth Step of 12-Step recovery states, “Made direct amends to such people wherever possible, except when to do so would injure them or others.” This is when an individual doesn’t just say “sorry,” but rather shows that they are sorry via their actions. They promise to live their recovery rather than just making promises. The whole family also needs to heal, and family therapy can help with this.

Finding Family in Recovery: The Benefits of Family Therapy

Therapy has been shown to work for individual recovery, and the same is true when it occurs with the entire family. One of the first factors that family therapy addresses is how the family must work as a functioning unit.

According to the International Journal of Environmental Research and Public Health, “From a systemic perspective, family is defined as a transactional system, where difficulties in any member have an influence on every other member and on the whole family as a unit. In turn, family processes have an impact on every individual member, as well as on the different relationships embedded within the family context. This perspective shifts away from a linear consideration of family processes by recognizing the multiple recursive influences that shape family relationships and family functioning, perceiving it as an ongoing process throughout the life cycle.” Once a family can see how the individual affects the whole, they can begin to heal at the cellular level.

The Benefits of Group Therapy

Much like family therapy, group therapy can also help by including multiple people in the process. Group therapy can help the individual struggling learn to work with other people to build the essential communication and life skills to bring back to the family.

Psychoeducational groups are a highly effective form of group therapy. According to the Substance Abuse and Mental Health Services Administration (SAMHSA), “Psychoeducational groups provide information designed to have a direct application to clients’ lives – to instill self-awareness, suggest options for growth and change, identify community resources that can assist clients in recovery, develop an understanding of the process of recovery, and prompt people using substances to take action on their own behalf, such as entering a treatment program. While psychoeducational groups may inform clients about psychological issues, they do not aim at intrapsychic change, though such individual changes in thinking and feeling often do occur.”

The Benefits of “Traditional” Therapies

Many “traditional” therapies can also be highly effective at helping to prepare an individual to get back and connect with the family unit. Traditional therapies generally refer to evidence-based psychotherapies like cognitive-behavioral therapy (CBT) and dialectical behavior therapy (DBT). Eye movement desensitization and reprocessing (EMDR) therapy is also an evidence-based psychotherapy that can be highly effective at treating addiction.

Also, EMDR is very effective when treating comorbidities of addiction and mental illness, like PTSD. According to the Innovations in Clinical Neuroscience, “Eye movement desensitization and reprocessing (EMDR) is a specific treatment modality that utilizes bilateral stimulation to help individuals who have experienced trauma. This stimulation can occur in a variety of forms, including left-right eye movements, tapping on the knees, headphones, or handheld buzzers, known as tappers… While EMDR is a relatively new type of psychotherapy, existing literature has demonstrated positive results using this form of therapy when treating patients with post-traumatic stress disorder (PTSD) by utilizing eye movements to detract from negative conceptualizations as a response to a specific trigger, while reaffirming positive self-assessments.”

DBT has also been shown to be highly effective. Many people have also reported that DBT has improved their relationships. According to the peer-reviewed journal Borderline Personality Disorder and Emotion Dysregulation, “Prior to DBT, participants reflected on how their relationships with others were impacted as a result of their difficulties, with some participants describing how they had lost touch with many of their friends. Participants spoke about how their relationships have improved as a result of DBT and how they have continued to improve in the years since completing the programme, where they now experience more positive and open relationships with others and have been able to reconnect with old friends….”

The Benefits of Yoga and Meditation

Yoga and meditation can be highly beneficial for recovery and getting one ready to reconnect with family in recovery. According to yogi and spiritual leader B.K.S. Iyengar, “As animals, we walk the earth; as bearers of divine essence, we are among the stars; as human beings, we are caught in the middle, seeking to reconcile the paradox of how to make our way upon earth while striving for something more permanent and more profound.” This is what yoga and meditation are all about.

Yoga and meditation have many benefits. Of course, these benefits are going to vary depending on many circumstances, but there are many common benefits. The following are just a few of the benefits of practicing yoga and meditation:

• A greater focus on mindfulness
• Creates empathy
• Acquiring a better sense of self
• Improved breathing
• Better strength and posture
• Finding a better sense of mental balance and clarity
• Helping one connect with others and heal relationships
• Increased positivity and wellness
• Connects individuals with new, relatable people
• Encourages spirituality
• Reduces anxiety and depression
• Can help individuals who struggle with suicidal ideations

As one can see, these benefits are vast and varied. These modalities also work very well with other types of treatment, making them even more valuable to individuals who are seeking a more comprehensive treatment plan. The key is finding the right types of treatments that work together and sticking to them. This can lead to a healthy connection with family in recovery.

Healing the Whole Family at the Cellular Level With Exclusive Hawaii Rehab

George Bernard Shaw also famously said, “Imagination is the beginning of creation. You imagine what you desire, you will what you imagine, and at last you create what you will.” Recovery is all about willing a new way of life – a life beyond one’s wildest dreams. It can also be a life reconciled with loved ones.

Here at Exclusive Hawaii Rehab, we believe in healing the whole family at the cellular level. That is why all of our recovery plans include the family. This ensures that everyone gets the healing that they both desire and deserve.

Recovery is all about the journey, and that journey is best traveled with family and friends. Recovery is waiting. You can do this! We can help.

Reconnecting with family can be a critical component of long-term recovery. It can be helpful to get a better idea of what that looks like, as well as how to navigate a family that may not be ready to reconnect. The good news is that taking the next right action in recovery often leads to reconciliation of the family. If you feel like you or a loved one is struggling with issues of addiction, mental illness, or both, we can help get you on the right road to recovery right away. You don’t have to go through this process alone. For more information about reconnecting with the family in recovery, reach out to Exclusive Hawaii Rehab today at (808) 775-0200